I would just like to give a warm welcome to Summer 2010! You have been missed! The past few days, post graduation, have been great! Sleeping non stop and being completely stress free! There was one point this weekend, when I relapsed just a little and my body went into panic mode because I was having fun and not studying and then I realized it was ok! Bekah being here this past weekend was phenomenal :) Best part? Interpretive dancing in a field for the cars driving by. Another good part? The scratches I have on my chin where the tree attacked me when I tried to hug it. Success!
Bad part of the last couple of days? I think I've gotten lazy. Scratch that, I know I've gotten lazy! Fact: Today was the first morning since Friday I woke up and read my Bible. I've had conversations with God and I've prayed, but honestly it just didn't feel the same. This morning I apologized and jumped right back in :) On top of that, I gave myself a new goal for the summer, which shouldn't be too difficult, and that's to read through the New Testament. There's so much good stuff going on, and I'm hoping it keeps me focused so that I can achieve Godly goals. I like routine too much to keep it entirely random....
Something that's been on my mind lately, since my birthday was a few weeks ago, is beauty. It was personified this weekend when my aunts were in town for my mom's graduation. When I think about myself and the things I'd like to change, it seems reasonable, but when I heard my aunts, I thought they were being just plain silly. So here it goes, for the thousandth time you've probably ever heard this, what you look like on the outside, doesn't matter. And you know who it really doesn't matter to? God, who is the only person we should be trying to please.
When I was in high school, I ran almost everyday. I go back and look at pictures and it blows my mind to see myself. But the other part of high school I remember, is cheerleading practice. Everyone always comparing their bodies to each other and the ridicule girls, including myself, would get for various and ridiculous things that can't really be helped. I had never really had a problem with my body, especially after all the baby fat melted away, until I got to cheer in high school. I remember looking at myself in my cheerleading uniform and still thinking I was too big to have it on. I remember being teased because certain parts of my body weren't big enough. At one point I remember being so down about it, my mom agreed to whatever it took to help me be more comfortable with what I looked like.
When I got to college, most of the superficial was gone, until I joined a sorority. All of a sudden, no one talked about how beautiful or perfect they were, it was obvious, lol. I thought it was about keeping a good appearance and making our house look good. As a freshman, in a completely new environment, that's all I could see. All these beautiful older members who so effortlessly were perfect in every way. The catch? Being older, mostly means you start to care less and less about what others think of you. You start to realize that there are more important things than looking good. And how do I know that? I think I'm one of them. Now, I can't imagine changing what I look like or what God made me to be. And I've learned that the less make up I wear, the better my skin feels. The less I blow dry, curl and then straighten my hair, the less dead it looks. And the more I run to relieve stress instead of to lose weight, the healthier I feel.
Good news: in college, you meet all sorts of different people who are all sorts of different sizes and shapes and colors, and all of a sudden, you forget. It's so easy for us to see someone else hurting about their looks and tell them they're beautiful, and yet so hard for us to tell ourselves the same things. More good news: those comforting words are just as applicable to ourselves. The bad news: the world may still see us for what's on the outside, and it won't always be easy to remind ourselves to care about what's on the inside, but God wrote it down for those times when we can't remind ourselves, saying that He "...does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart," 1 Samuel 16:7.
It's a shame that there aren't more people that look at hearts than what's going on physically, it's also a shame that our society tells girls at a young age that they should strive to look like this or that and put women on magazines half dressed and then airbrush them to impossible skin tones and sizes. It's not real. And people who make friendships based on such things aren't real friends. And relationships based on such things isn't real love. But God is real, and He will really love you no matter what. If we're too tall or too short. If we're unproportioned in our bodies. With red, brown, blonde or anything inbetween hair. Red and yellow, black or white skin :) He loves everyone, and He made everyone with a specific plan for them. So finally, 1 Timothy 2:9-10 says "I also want women to dress modeslty, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God." I don't think this is necessarily saying don't braid your hair or wear any jewelery ever again, but it's saying that we should recognize that none of those things matter when we worship God.
Final thoughts from Proverbs 31:30: "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." A few weeks ago, I started noticing more gray hairs and the wrinkles around my eyes and I started to feel old! I know, I'm not, but I can only imagine these things getting worse as I do get older. But you know why I have wrinkles around my eyes? From smiling so big and laughing so hard. And I'm not sure where or why I have gray hairs, but if they do come from worry, then they came from the hardships and obstacles that I've been through with God. I don't want to get rid of proof that I've lived my life accordingly. I may dye my hair someday or purchase anti-aging creams eventually, but today and hopefully forever, I remember that I'm exactly who I am because God made me. On another note, it's not always easy to be who we are because we want to be well liked and popular and for girls, it's assumed that guys care more about what's physically there than a girls heart. But that's not always the case. I still fully believe that God made everyone's perfect match, and that in that, they don't see flaws they see beauty. Guys worth dating, will see our hearts and deeds and will praise us because we fear the Lord.
Dear boys, I understand that none of this may relate to you in any way. But I am not so easily fooled, and I am sure that there is just as much pressure for guys to be, look, and act certain ways according to the media. It doesn't matter either though. And when you look for girls worth dating, the ones caught up in themselves or their looks shouldn't be the first way you go.
On another note, I love the Dove Campaign for Real Beauty. I hope that if I have daughters, I will be able to show them the difference.
I love you! Happy Tuesday! And don't forget about Glee :))
Oh and just in case:
Fake (adj)- to conceal the defects of or make appear more attractive, interesting, valuble, etc; to pretend or simulate; to trick or decieve
Beauty (n)- a quality present in a thing or person that gives intense pleasure or deep satisfaction to the mind, whether arising from sensory manifestations, a meaningful design or pattern, or something else such as a personality in which high spiritual qualities are manifest; something excellent of its kind; extraordinary
:) like this. needed it.
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